Funny ICD-10.2 Codes Never Before Discovered!

UPDATE:  ICD-10 has been delayed until October 1st, 2015.

If you have never had a chance to cruise through the 68,000 ICD-10 codes set to go live on October 1st, 2014, you're missing out on some great humor.  What does ICD stand for?  ICD stands for International Statistical Classification of Diseases and Related Health Problems. provides a nice brief review of the transition from ICD-9 to ICD-10.  If you do a Google search for funny ICD-10 codes, you'll find some healthcare related websites claiming to describe the best, funniest, strangest, most outrageous and colorful codes in the book.  Heck,  some sites even claim to have discovered the zaniest ICD-10 codes around.

Hogwash.  Struck by a turtle (W5922XA)?  Not outrageous.   Problems with the in-laws (Z63.1)?   Not zany.  Not even close.  That's just stupid.  Struck by orca, initial encounter (W56.22xA).  Not the least bit colorful.  Quit wasting our time people. We only have a few more months to master ICD-10 before the most popular phrase in healthcare becomes a reality: Your claim has been denied.   Even though ICD-10 is almost here and  ICD-11 has a 2017 date with destiny, The Happy Hospitalist has learned the government is set to announce  a January 1st, 2015 start date for ICD 10.2.

That's right folks, you heard it here first on The Happy Hospitalist.  You'd better enjoy ICD-10 as much as you can for those last three months of 2014, because ICD-10.2 is just around the corner.  For the last five years, The Happy Hospitalist Government Consulting Group has been asked to participate in developing thousands of new codes that more accurately reflect the healthcare experience.  Starting January 1st, 2015, ICD-10.2 will expand to 482,697 codes.  In addition to the numerous letters and numbers extending several decimal points, ICD 10.2 will add a mandatory hieroglyphic symbol to the last code definition.

This promises to add several trillion dollars to the cost of healthcare as doctors and hospitals scramble to buy computers, keyboards and software that can handle this ancient Egyptian language.  In addition, new government regulations are set to require bedside physician-to-patient communication explaining to patients, in detail,  which ICD 10.2 codes are being submitted for payment.  If the physician is not fluent in Ancient Egyptian hieroglyphics, they will be required to purchase MARTI language interpretation systems that offer this service as part of the Super Expensive Languages of Ancient Worlds add-on option.

The exact codes of these real life medical diagnoses have not yet been established but are open to public comment until 12:00 PM EDT on  December 31st, 2014 at the website.  This gives all stakeholders 12 hours to comply with any final determinations.  Without further delay, here is the Top Ten List of Best ICD-10.2 Diagnoses that made the final cut!
  1. One-In-A-Million-Doc; Implanted Household Device In Rectum; First Time
  2. Positive Meth Test; Patient Claims He Didn't Take No F***in' Meth
  3. Abdominal Pain In The ER, Not Exacerbated By Big Mac Brought In By Baby Daddy
  4. Completely Satisfied Patient With No Complaints About Stupid Stuff
  5. Any Injury Due To Less Than 1/10 Of An Inch Of Snow; Atlanta, Georgia
  6. Facial Trauma Secondary to Getting Beat Up By Sum Dude
  7. Hospital Acquired COPD Exacerbation After Going Outside For "Some Fresh Air"
  8. Family Upset Nobody Explains Anything; 4 or More One Hour Family Conferences Documented
  9. Patient Upset Hospital Discharge Paperwork Not Complete 10 Minutes Or Less After Doctor Visit
  10. Leaving Against Medical Advice Because Patient Believes Dr Oz Would Recommend It

"Abdominal pain in the ER not exacerbated by Big Mac brought in my baby daddy?  There's a code for that!"

Abdominal pain in the ER not exacerbated by Big Mac brought in by baby daddy?  There's a code for that nurse ecard humor photo

For more ground breaking insight, make sure to also checkout the complete list of fake medical diagnoses, medical slang, and medical mispronunciations.

This post contains humor that may only be understood by some healthcare professionals. Read at your own risk.

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