If you work in an academic hospital institution, it's time to get your new resident list up and ready. July 1st is generally considered the first day of training for all new medical doctors, otherwise known as the July Effect. Most medical students earn their Doctorate of Medicine degree in May of any given year. Two months later they are seeing patients and writing orders as new interns in their residency or fellowship training program. July 1st is generally their start date.
If you are a nurse and you work in an academic hospital teaching institution, that means you're going to have to get out your new resident list and start putting a face with a name. Nurses learn very quickly which residents are quick learners and which ones take extra assistance to learn the ropes on the floors. Residents also learn which nurses are an asset to their training program and which ones will save them when they screw up.
Some residents use July 1st as an opportunity to inflate their ego as a new doctor on the block. If you are a new intern, don't be an idiot. You don't know anything about anything when it comes to taking care of patients. Close your mouth and listen to the wisdom of everyone around you. You're going to screw up and when you do, you're going to want people helping you through the process. Some nurses use the July effect as an opportunity to obstruct the learning process and abuse residents in training with self elevating hazing that offers no therapeutic value in patient care. These are the nurses that hate their job and hate their life. Pay no attention to them.
July 1st interns don't know anything about taking care of patients. Accept that as an attending. Accept it as a nurse. That's why they are interns. That's why residency programs have a hierarchy from the supervising resident to the attending physician that guides them on their journey. Medical education is a learning process. I remember my first call ever I didn't know the appropriate doses of any medication. I was afraid to write more than 0.5 mg of Ativan for an out of control grandma swinging at all the nurses. By the next week I was writing 10 mg an hour for an alcoholic. These intern ecards below helps to explain.
The learning curve is quick and intense and like nothing anyone can imagine without experiencing it. If you are a patient on July 1st and you have a new resident intern taking care of you, understand they are just as scared as you are. Also realize there are highly qualified people watching out for you as well. If you don't want a new resident intern taking care of you, don't get sick in July at an academic training institution. Stay healthy, don't smoke, exercise and be your own best defense against that new resident list and the July effect.
"July interns remind me of when I was an idiot. But, that was a long time ago."
"New interns always suck really bad. Except the super hot ones. I usually page them to the bedside every hour stat to fill my prescription for eye candy."
And if that new intern happened to be the cleaning lady instead of a doctor...
I'm minding my own business when I hear the cleaning lady come running out of the room in a state of panic.You know the cleaning lady is new to the hospital when she comes running out of a patient's room yelling "I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING! I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING!" with regards to a beeping IV pole hooked up to a patient. Poor thing must have been scared out of her mind. I guess they didn't get an orientation day about beeping IV poles, like I got on my first day as a hospitalist.
Trainer: What do you do if you walk in a room and an IV pole is beeping?
Happy: Call the nurse.
This post is for entertainment purposes only and likely contains humor only understood by those in a healthcare profession. Read at your own risk.