I'm not a big hospital gossip kind of guy. In fact, I try my best to avoid talking about rumors that are always permeating through the nurses station. I find the less I know about the life decisions of others, the fewer opinions I'll have on the manner. Over my ten years as a private practice hospitalist I've heard rumors up the wazoo about infidelity between between colleagues. I just assume stay away from all that nonsense. Mrs Happy is a nurse. And yes, we met while I was a resident. Neither one of us were married at the time, but I'm sure we were the subject of many gossip sessions during my final year of training.
She always said she would never date a doctor because they never had time for their family. I guess my charming personality was too much for her to resist. She was the only nurse in seven years of training that ever asked the lowly students or residents if she could help them. In my experience, most nurses in training excelled at making the life of training doctors difficult. That's why Mrs Happy is special. She has a heart of gold.
When I was in medical school and internal medicine residency, the gossip mill was always filled to the brim with rumors of every kind. Doctors were sleeping with nurses. Residents were sleeping with residents. Medical students were sleeping with professors. Hell, medical students were sleeping with everyone. Nurses were sleeping with drug reps. Surgeons were sleeping with. Correction, nobody would sleep with the surgeons. They were all jerks. Some doctors were even doing drugs.
Today, I try and stay away from all that junior high mentality. What people do on their own time is their own business. The way I see it, the same people who spread gossip and rumors are probably the same people talking about you behind your back. So I try my best to avoid all of it. That's not to say I can't have a little fun once in a while. What's the best way to get some juicy gossip going in your hospital? Go where everyone has to go. The best way to start a juicy rumor is to leave a fake anonymous message on the dry erase board in the hospital staff bathroom and do hospital rounds the next day to hear all about it.
Now you know how hospitalists make it through their day in one piece!Nurse#1: Oh my God. Did you hear that two of our nurses are pregnant?
Nurse#2: One of them has to be _______. She's looking a little big these days.
Nurse#1: No way she's pregnant. She doesn't even have a boyfriend.
Nurse#2: You're kidding right. She's been sleepin' with that respiratory therapist for months.
Nurse#1: I didn't know about that....
This nurse someecard also helps explain what what life as a floor nurse is like in the hosptial.
